Calendars are useful for one thing, tracking time. There's nothing really magical about New Year's Day and the changing from one year to another.
January 1st does not invoke amnesia for me; its yesterday's tomorrow and will be tomorrow's yesterday. While I achieved personal and professional successes in 2012, I also experienced great emotional pain with the loss of loved ones that I have yet to overcome. No calendar date can change my experiences or emotions. You just don't wake up on New Year's Day and feel all better. Our country is in turmoil; we are at war abroad and with ourselves at home, the economy is still on shaky ground, folks can't find jobs, and I am certain that the families of the victims at Sandy Hook are still grieving about the violent acts perpetrated on their loved ones and the losses they can never regain. All of these things are real, true, and simply will not change just because the calendar year has changed. Its proof, there's nothing magical about New Year's Day.
Society would have us believe that we have to wait until January 1st of any given year to make the changes in our lives that we could have made every day during the last 365 days; that if we can just survive a few more days, weeks, or months in our dysfunction, we will be able to turn it all around on January 1st. Some will, but most won't. In fact, I recently fell into the "just a few more days of dysfunction" trap on Christmas Day, as I made a conscious decision to just eat however I wanted for the last 7 days of the year. But after two hours of vomiting at 3:00 a.m. on Christmas night (I know that's TMI, but I'm all about making a point), my New Year's Day began on December 26th. I was thankful that my body was talking to me saying "we don't do this anymore".
Trying to make substantial changes solely based on a calendar date, instead thoughtful and honest assessments of our needs and realistic capabilities, is a set up for failure. The likelihood of successful change over a sustained period of time is reduced when we make "fad decisions". Motivation must come from within based on our individual circumstances, regardless of the date. I know this from experience. February 24, 2012 was my New Year's Day last year when I decided that being obese with hypertension, diabetes, liver and heart disease was not going to be my fate; that I had to make some major changes in my lifestyle if I wanted to lose weight; that there are no gimmicks, programs, or other mechanisms to substitute for good old fashion discipline in my eating and exercise; and that it was going to take a long time and be a permanent lifestyle change. That's a lot to swallow; much more than the "I need to shed 10 pounds to fit in a dress" challenge. My decision had nothing to do with the date, and everything to do with the lab results I was faced with and the fact that I was ready for a change.
One of the responsibilities we have as adults is to conduct constant and true assessments of who and where we are in our lives at any given time, coupled with the courage and conviction to self-correct (oh, and knowing that you can't change everything at the same time). I'm not knocking anyone who has made a New Year Resolution, but if you have, make it work because you really need the change. If you slip up, don't stop. Start over again (and again, and again). Learning to forgive ourselves and using mistakes as learning opportunities (instead of making excuses) sets us up for sustained success over time. You also have to be able to laugh at yourself at times. Trust me, it helps.
And if you haven't made a New Year Resolution on January 1st, whenever you gain the courage, strength, and desire to start anew, that's when YOUR NEW YEAR will begin!
Have a positive day because KIM SAID so.
